When you love somebody so much why do you lie and want them to think the opposite. I posted a lot of bullshit on this blog just in hopes that he would be reading it. I posted about how i hated him. I posted about i don’t remember because i never read back but i know i wrote bad things. I don’t know if that’s why he hates me. Maybe you don’t hate me. Im posting this because in my head i figure you might be reading it now, and if you are that means you care.

Why can’t we feel what we feel is the point im trying to make. I tell you i love you, and pour my heart out. I don’t know if you’re playing hard to get, being cautious to open up again, or if you even love me a little, maybe you do a lot even. I can’t tell unless you tell me. I don’t like games anymore. I want to hear your passion and true feelings.

Im trying to gain your trust back, but when you reply to my emails a whole day later, it feels like you don’t care, even in the replies i can tell you are being guarded. You never say you miss me too, or love me too.

Are you afraid to, or do you not love me. It’s so hard for me to understand what is right. Should i keep trying, or let you be to make your decisions.

Love drunk me written by me

Looking all fat -_-

thechriscrocker:

And I know you would love me in any shape or form. And I know when you say you love me every night and every morning, you’re not saying it to the boy in me or the girl- I know when you say you love me you would hold my hand in the hospital if I got gender reassignment surgery. I know when you say you love me it isn’t the image of me, but the bad with the good… I know this because you listen when I talk and you hear what I am not saying. I know this because of the way we break through to each other. I know this because of the way look into my eyes. You’re not seeing blue. You’re seeing truth. And for that- You will always have a part of me no one else has ever had.

Once i let the anger go, there was still love underneath.

A separation period in a relationship should be looked at as a good thing. You need time to see if that was really what you wanted. What you can fix. What you can work on yourself & together.

You’ve been through the bad, the fighting, if you’re both willing to try again things could be so much better this time around.

So never lose hope.

When strangers compliment the hell out of you?! When straight men compliment the hell out of you?! What does this mean?

Oh you’re such a great guy, you’re so funny, attractive, nice?! Why are you telling me this?! You claim to be straight, but you want to lay next to me in bed all morning. “Im not gay but” starts all your phrases.

When you only want attention from one person, but they barely acknowledge your existence, while the strange straight men compliment you continually. Idegi

I want to start a blog. It sounds fun, but then i realised i already have a million of them bitches.

Id write about my personal life still, but that’s quite embarrassing. It’s always been juicy. When you write about your personal life you have to be willing to share everything, and that’s not the kind of person i want to be anymore.

Even my earlier posts on here i shared a lot, but it could always go deeper.

So today Amanda Bynes is in the news, because she wants Drake to pound her pussy. I don’t want to talk about that part of her. I just want to know like the rest of us what the hell is going on with her?!

I grew up thinking that bitch was a comic genius at the young age she was. The Amanda show, All that, she was a fucking star. Actually now it makes me wonder if she was just a good actress?! Do 10 year olds write their own skits & shit?? Probably not.

But when i was just a boy i looked up to that ma-ha bitch. You know things that make you into the person you are today. Her show was a factor in me. I would say lines at school, on the bus, at home with my family.

My bestfriend Megan in school was like Amanda.

ANYWAY I don’t know what to think. You can YouTube her & see interviews for Easy A in like 2010, but she hasn’t been publicly interviewed since.

I don’t think people just go crazy. So the only thing you can think is she wants the media attention, but when she retired from acting it was to live a normal life & get out of the spotlight.

Why does one start drinking out of the blue when she was never into that in the past. Drinking & driving to be like LiLo?! It makes no sense.

I want an explanation & i want it now. I don’t like seeing people turn into train wrecks. Is she crazy in the head like Britney or just phony?! Halp. Better yet why do i care.

This has been my first blog, written like a scatter brained 6th grader. Peace out.